Monthly Archives: April 2017

Teens Committing Suicide



This teen couple committed suicide over the weekend apparently over bullying, first the girl killed herself and a couple of days later the guy killed himself because he couldn’t live without his girlfriend. And as sad of a situation as this is, I’m at this point having a hard time feeling bad when these teen suicides continue to happen over and over these days. Because I feel like teens killing themselves has become a thing to do and I feel like parents aren’t raising their kids right anymore. Let me explain, bullying has been happening since there has been life and it probably will always continue to happen just like a lot of things that are unfortunate will continue to happen in life.

But if these parents raise their kids to be stronger individuals and strong people in general then these teens wouldn’t be so weak minded to let anything make them want to kill themselves. Kids/teens these days are just so weak minded because they aren’t raised to be stronger people by their parents. And parents aren’t watching their kinds like they should be, a lot of these suicides could of been stopped had parents been paying more attention to their kids and what their kids were doing. So it doesn’t all fall on these teens or their bullies, it falls on the parents more then anything in a lot of these situations in my opinion. Parents just aren’t doing their job like they should be but I feel like teens killing themselves has become like a trend with this generation.

You never heard of teens killing themselves in any other generation like you do now because teens have never been so weak minded like they are now. They were way more strong minded and raised to be stronger then that but these days I really feel like suicide has become a trend and a thing to do with these teens and it’s so sad that I feel that way but that’s honestly how I feel and I have a hard time really feeling true sympathy when these things continue to happen because I know that if parents step up and do better that alone will stop a lot of this!


Am I Cold hearted Or Am I Real/Honest

I was on the phone with babe and he was asking me some questions and I guess that my answers shocked him because he was asking me if I would ever date/be with a guy that’s special needs or disabled and I was very honest when I said NO I wouldn’t. And I explained to him that I’m just not acquitted for that kind of lifestyle and that’s not the kind of life that I want for myself and definitely not for my son. And I don’t feel like there’s anything wrong with how I feel or me being honest about this. I feel like certain people are meant for that kind of life and I’m just not one of those people. And in reality I think that I should be respected for being honest with myself when it comes to this topic and I don’t think that I’m cold hearted for not lying to myself about this type of situation.

I think that more people should be honest with themselves about things in life, especially when it comes to things like this. But most importantly I think that more people should be honest with themselves and not put themselves in situations that they know that they aren’t acquitted to be in, in the first place. I don’t think that I’m wrong in how I feel, I think that I’m honest with myself and I would never put myself in a situation that I know that I’m not meant to be in. That kind of life just isn’t for me and I’m okay with that!

Dad working my nerves

If you’ve been following my blog then you know that my dad is in a nursing home, well we go visit him on Saturdays and some weeks things with him are good and some days things with him are bad. And for me today is a bad day with my dad, as soon as I walked in the door he went to talking crazy and we’ve been over the issue that he brought up multiple times before and I get it, he wants to go home but that’s just not happening, he’s way past the point of being able to go home. That’s just not an option at this point in his life and he knows this but at times it’s like he loses track of reality and I get that in his old age and him not wanting to be in the nursing home and the fact that he hasn’t fully accepted that this is the point of where he is at 81 years old, it makes it hard for him to accept certain things.

So I get that I might sound unsupportive and like I’m not being a loving daughter but I’m also human and I can only take so much and I’ve hit yet another breaking point when it comes to my dad and his antics when we come to see him at times. And just because he’s old and in denial doesn’t mean that he has the right to treat us, me/my mom and especially when we are the people that do the most for him. I just think that I might have to stop coming to see my dad every week for a while and maybe start coming to see him every other week for a little while. sometimes we need to miss people and realize what we are missing and I may just need time away from my dad for my own sanity. I just needed to vent after walking into my dad room today and him instantly upsetting me and pushing me to yet another breaking point since he’s been in the nursing home. Sometimes I just need to vent, I’m human!

One Year After Losing Prince

Yesterday was one year to the day of the death of one of the greatest entertainers that this world will ever know and the greatest genius of this time in my opinion. And I chose to remember him by watching all of his videos that MTV did in an eight episode tribute marathon and I dvred every episode and watched them all yesterday. I chose to sing, dance, smile and be happy celebrating his life and his music instead of being sad. And I had a great time and I know that’s how the purple one would want us fans being, happy celebrating him and his music instead of being sad.


Diamonds And Pearls from Hotwax Residues on Vimeo.

Rest in purple paradise to the one and only purple one Prince, make more amazing music up there and I know that you’re rocking out on the guitar up there also. I’ll love and adore you forever my Prince, 4/21!

Towanda Braxton And Husband Divorcing

I was watching last nights episode of Braxton family values and Towanda Braxton and her husband are going through a divorce on the show and he’s basically asking for everything, both houses and full custody of their kids. Now as a parent myself and a mother and the bond between child to mother I could understand why Towanda damn near lost her mind when he lawyer told her that her husband wants their kids. So I was completely team Towanda when it came to her fighting to get full or joint custody of their kids.

But she met up with her husband on last nights episode and after hearing some of the things that he had to say, as to why he should get full custody of their kids his points were very valid and I changed teams and I get why he feels the way that he does. Hearing him bring up the fact that she’s always flying off to see her sisters instead being with her children and anybody that’s watched this show knows that all of the Braxton family, especially the sisters travel way to much to call themselves the true definition of mothers and family people in the ways that matter. Real parents don’t just leave their kids all the time like these Braxtons do, as a mother I wouldn’t be able to look at myself in the mirror knowing that I left my child to be with anybody as much as these Braxton’s do.

When you decide to have kids they are suppose to be your priority not your sisters, and Towanda is always flying off to be with her sister meanwhile he husband is the stay at home dad, always home with the kids. So when hr brought that up when they were talking it made sense as to why he would want full custody of their kids. And I honesty feel like if she did have full custody of their kids she would end up leaving them off on other people like she does with her husband now. So I think that he should get full custody and she should have visitation or they should do joint custody. But I don’t think that she should get full custody after the points that he made and after years of watching Braxton family values and seeing how much they all travel and how much they all seem to be away from their kids. I think that it would be best for her husband to get full custody and I’m shocked that I feel that way but I think that it would be what’s best for their children!

And I think that not only Towanda but all of the Braxton sisters need to learn that their kids should be their priority not each other as sisters. And that their lives should be at home more then it should be traveling to all of these places!

Jackie Robinson Day

I’ve gotten into baseball recently and watching some of today’s/yesterday’s games and I’m learning that April 15th of every year in baseball is Jackie Robinson day and every teams players wear number 42 in honor/memory of him. And after seeing the movie called 42 about his life in baseball and seeing all that he went through just to play baseball, break barriers for black people and other minorities and just to share the gift that God gave him with the world was crazy to see. I’ve never had a movie make me so upset/made/angry and sad all in one like this 42 movie did. It literally had me in tears by the end, it was such a great/touching/heartbreaking/true story of how hard it was for black people back in the 1940’s and in baseball more then anything in this movie.


It was a story/the story that needed to be told and I would like to think that Jackie Robinson would be proud of that movie and his story finally being told and it was so well told. So for me after seeing that movie and all these years later to see all these white baseball players wearing his number, when if this was 40-50 or more years ago some of these same white players would hate black baseball players. I feel like Jackie Robinson is finally getting the justice that he so deserves and I feel like he’s looking down having the last laugh and I feel like he’s looking down happy at how far we’ve come as black people but most importantly how far baseball has come. I feel like he’s looking down and is proud and happy.

jackie-robinson 2

I’ve definitely been sitting here crying some tonight knowing all of this, it makes me feel so many emotions inside but I know that all of the suffering that Jackie Robinson went through wasn’t for nothing. He’s the true definition of a hero and if it wasn’t for him who knows if black men would be playing baseball in the major leagues or at all for that matter. So as hard as it is knowing what Jackie Robinson went through it was all worth it in the end!

How Different Things Look As An Adult

So the other day I was watching N’Sync called it’s gonna be me and for some reason I found the video to be so hilarious and I was noticing how amazing of a video it was choreography wise and the music video treatment also. And it was so crazy to me because it wasn’t the first time that I’ve seen this video but it was the first time that I’ve this video in probably about 15 years or so. So seeing this video now as a 32 year old adult made me it in different eyes and actually have an opinion of the video.

Seeing this video as an adult made me see all the hard work that went into this video, the treatment of this particular video was such an amazing and ahead of its time video. Whoever wrote this video was a smart writer and the choreography was amazingly done and every move had to be on point. It just amazed me that as an adult I actually have an opinion of a video that I’ve probably seen hundreds of times as a teenager and back then I didn’t think anything of it. But now as an adult I find this video hilarious and I see all the hard work that was behind this particular video.

It just blew my mind how different age and time can change ones outlook on something that they’ve seen or experienced before but at a different/younger time in their life. I actually like this video a lot more now seeing it through adult eyes and seeing this video for what it really is. And not to mention that no video has ever made me laugh the way that  this video did, it’s down right hilarious to me. I love it so much, as I always have, just more now. Amazing/great/ahead of it’s time video!