Sad news today in the music world, singer Chester Bennington of Linkin Park committed suicide this morning and I was talking to my mom about him committing suicide and now I’m not much of a Linkin Park fan, I’ve really only liked one of their songs from years ago. But I still know what they’ve brought to music over the years, so I know what loss this is to many people that have always loved Linkin Park. But as I said I was talking to my mom about him committing suicide and I was telling her that he said that he had been molested as a child and my mom was like well him killing himself because of that was stupid and that he was stupid for killing himself over something that happened so many years ago in his life. And I was trying to tell her that being molested is something that a person will have to deal with for the rest of their lives and she has no clue what that kind of pain feels like because she’s never been molested. But she just kept saying that he’s dumb ass hell for killing himself over something that happened so many years ago and that plenty of people have been molested and they don’t kill themselves.
And yes my mom does have a point when she says that plenty of people have been molested as children and they haven’t killed themselves but everybody doesn’t deal with things the same way or handle things the same way. And things affects everybody differently and clearly for Chester Bennington he just couldn’t handle living what happened to him on this earth, clearly he couldn’t handle the pressures of whatever happened in his life and he felt like the only way out was to take his own life. Now I personally will never agree with somebody taking their own life, to me that’s a cowardly and selfish ass thing to do and killing yourself doesn’t just affect your life, it also affects the people that love you and in this case he had six children that need and depend on him. And he was selfish as hell to take himself away from his children more then anything, along with all the people that love and care about him.
And there are so many ways the handle that kind of depression, it’s 2017, there’s so reason why about should feel like suicide is the way to go, when there’s so much help out there now for that type of depression. And to me to kill yourself is the cowardly way out, you’re choosing to end it all instead of living and dealing with your issues head on. But I guess that he did what he felt like he had to do but I personally think that anybody that’s selfish enough to kill themselves are cowards and I do believe that they will burn in hell for all eternity like the bible says but I also can’t imagine what that kind of pain and depression feels like but I also could never be that kind of selfish or that much of a coward! But I pray that his family and his kids more then anything can find some kind of peace and can find a way to live with his passing!
I was watching last nights episode of Braxton family values and Towanda Braxton and her husband are going through a divorce on the show and he’s basically asking for everything, both houses and full custody of their kids. Now as a parent myself and a mother and the bond between child to mother I could understand why Towanda damn near lost her mind when he lawyer told her that her husband wants their kids. So I was completely team Towanda when it came to her fighting to get full or joint custody of their kids.
But she met up with her husband on last nights episode and after hearing some of the things that he had to say, as to why he should get full custody of their kids his points were very valid and I changed teams and I get why he feels the way that he does. Hearing him bring up the fact that she’s always flying off to see her sisters instead being with her children and anybody that’s watched this show knows that all of the Braxton family, especially the sisters travel way to much to call themselves the true definition of mothers and family people in the ways that matter. Real parents don’t just leave their kids all the time like these Braxtons do, as a mother I wouldn’t be able to look at myself in the mirror knowing that I left my child to be with anybody as much as these Braxton’s do.
When you decide to have kids they are suppose to be your priority not your sisters, and Towanda is always flying off to be with her sister meanwhile he husband is the stay at home dad, always home with the kids. So when hr brought that up when they were talking it made sense as to why he would want full custody of their kids. And I honesty feel like if she did have full custody of their kids she would end up leaving them off on other people like she does with her husband now. So I think that he should get full custody and she should have visitation or they should do joint custody. But I don’t think that she should get full custody after the points that he made and after years of watching Braxton family values and seeing how much they all travel and how much they all seem to be away from their kids. I think that it would be best for her husband to get full custody and I’m shocked that I feel that way but I think that it would be what’s best for their children!
And I think that not only Towanda but all of the Braxton sisters need to learn that their kids should be their priority not each other as sisters. And that their lives should be at home more then it should be traveling to all of these places!
I wanted to do this posting because I sometimes will get hate because I’m black and I guess that I’m suppose to be the voice of all black people and think for all or think the way that a lot of black people seem to think but I don’t and will never work that way. I’m an adult that can think for herself and me being black has nothing to do with how I think, how I feel or my views on certain things. but I do feel like a lot of black people let the fact that they are black determine how they feel about certain things. They’ve completely lost all sense of self and having their own minds and their own opinions when it comes to certain things.
For example this whole Chrisette Michele/Donald Trump thing, the fact that she’s a black woman that chose to perform at his inauguration because God forbid that a black person do anything to help Donald Trump out or to make him look good, especially the day that he was sworn in and every black person in the country is against him. So its the end of the world the fact that she chose to accept what was done and accept things for what they were/are and that’s the fact that Donald Trump was/is our president now! I mean me personally there’s nothing that could get me to ever even be in the same room as somebody that’s such a horrible disgusting person like Donald Trump but I get why she chose to perform for him and at the end of the day that was still a huge deal and a once in a lifetime opportunity for her and she did actually use it to make a statement for black people. But I think that people were to busy being mad to see that part of her performance.
But it’s just another example of black feeling like all black people have to think alike or feel the same way about every little thing and not have their own minds and opinions on things. Another example and the main reasons why I’m doing this blog post is because I’m the first to speak up against black people, I’m the first person to say what I can’t stand, what I don’t like about black people and the things that a lot of times makes me ashamed to be black. I’m also at a point in my life where I have moments where I only want to date white men and oh my God the hate that I get for that from black men. Because God forbid that a black woman want a white man when it comes to black men, they get so upset and so “but hurt so to speak”.
Black men can’t handle a black woman not wanting them and her wanting a white man, it’s like their world comes to an end. And sometimes when I say something that goes against the opinions of black people or I defend a white person online I sometimes get so much hate because I like Chrisette Michele also have my own mind on things and me being black will never be the reason why I feel the way that I do about anything in life! Me being ME, me being QUANTAE, me having my own mind, my own opinions and my own outlook on things and ME BEING THE PERSON THAT RUNS MY MIND will always be the reasons why I feel the way that I do on things and that’s it as far as I go!
I just think that a lot of black people need to learn to think for themselves and stop letting their color control and dictate their opinions, how they feel and run their brains for them. I think that a lot of black people need to let who they are as a person and as adults be what determines how they feel about things and that’s it! And they need to worry less about how others feel and what others think and worry more about themselves and they need to realize that some of know better then to let our color run our lives!
I watched an episode of this show called unsung about music artist/groups that at one time in their career had amazing success and now they aren’t as successful/famous anymore or they may be dead or had members of their group die over the years. Long story short is they did a episode about this now iconic group called Lisa Lisa and the cult and I was looking at her hairstyle from back in the 1980’s and I was like wow this is crazy to see a hair style from over 30’s ago now be the same kind of hairstyles that we now wear today.
Looking at Lisa Lisa hair, I’m like wow we are now getting our haircut just like how she wore her hair all those years ago, its just another reminder of how life changes but stays the same also. And I actually love how Lisa Lisa wore her haircut back then and she said on this episode of unsung that she actually cut her hair like this on accident because she had been cutting her own hair and she cut to much off on one side. So I would have to say that she probably should get the credit for starting a hairstyle that has carried on for over 30 plus years.